The San Francisco Chronicle

JULY 31, 2003, THURSDAY, FINAL EDITION

SECTION: EDITORIAL; Pg. A20; LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

LENGTH: 1228 words

HEADLINE: LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

BODY:
A FANTASY LEAGUE IN TERRORISM FUTURES

Editor -- A government-sponsored terrorist-themed futures market is a jackpot
idea. At last our nation's elite can prosper from their sinister manipulations
directly into an online account, bypassing the tradition of war profiteering
through industry. As long as they buy low and kill high, I'm bullish at least
until Ramadan.

But why only allow well-to-do investors all the fun? I'm looking forward to a
day when our casinos have a Big Board of Babylon to tick off the odds of
fanaticism's body count. Americans of all stripes can shoot craps, take in a
show and contribute to genocide all under one roof.

I'm running a fantasy league with the same idea. My friends and I chat each
morning about the stats and latest line on the intifada, Afghan warlords and
petrochemical interests, and good-naturedly rib each other about the crosstown
rivalry of the Sunnis and Shiites. As the trade deadline looms, I'm looking to
unload Saddam Hussein, with his bloated prewar salary, and the ineffectual
Yasser Arafat for an exiled rookie Saudi cleric and three Yemenis to be named
later. The victor, should there ever be one, gets a sack full of sand.

DAN DION

San Francisco

-- -- --

Editor -- I'm extremely disappointed that the Defense Advanced Research Projects
Agency's latest idea, the foreign policy futures market, has been snuffed. I
love the values on which America was built, such as capitalism and innovation.
The foreign policy futures market would have combined those brilliantly.

Only the government could have done it right, because only the government could
have properly screened the traders. But politicians permeated with monotony
joined forces to crush this cheap, efficient, workable plan, which could have
added to the knowledge and safety of the entire world. I suppose if we can't
expect truth from our leaders, it's futile to hope for reason.

MADELINE FERWERDA

Oakland